There are thoughts now.
Thoughts over the horizon of books like a coming storm, the flashes of light over the horizon that tell you turbulent weather is out there, somewhere, and it may or may not be coming your way.
It is one of the beautiful things about living in the desert, the vast tracts of nothingness and the skies that stretch on forever. And at night, when the storms are rolling about and their light shows on full display, the light shows in the heavens that let you know exactly how small you are in this universe, and how short your life really is in the scheme of things.
And the storms do not always hit. In books, typically if you write about a storm it is sure to come, because if you didn't pull that literary card out of your hat and warn of it, why wouldn't you use it? No, out here, our Creator plays with us in mysterious ways. Not every storm that threatens hits. You will get calm nights with light shows that dazzle and make you stop and stare at a pitch black sky, waiting for the next burst of intense white light to light up the night, or maybe just a spot on the inky black horizon miles away.
The storm, for all its bombast and bluster, may never come.
It could be traveling in a line away from you, beside you, or going somewhere over there in the black of night. You could see the stars above and still watch the storms at night. You could wake up the next day and not see one puddle of water from a single drop of rain.
Yet the memories of the light show will stay with you for a while, until they themselves fade away.
Such it is with the books floating around in my head. Longer this time, more of a commitment. Something spectacular, or something simple. Or perhaps, something myself. The thoughts echo inside my head like the lights of that storm, flashing to life every once and a while in an inky sea of blackness and despair.
Writing about it helps.
I force myself to write daily, taking time off for the weekends to reflect and rest, but yet pushing on with a commitment to write something, anything, each day. When I stumble is when something overwhelmingly negative comes out, and I am purging less negativity these days two weeks in. I don't like the negative thoughts because they are less true to who I am, but since I am being transparent here in my rehabilitation as a writer I put them out. My frustrations revolve around the platforms, free speech, the ability for content creators to make a living off their work, and allowing writers the freedom to write about whatever they choose and have a place to share that without fear.
If there is two sides of people in this world, it is those who peddle fear and those who believe in coming together. I don't care what party you swear loyalty to, what views you share on social media, you can fall into one of those buckets and be either a force of negativity in this world or one of positivism.
And a positive force can be one that has a mostly negative voice, such as a horror writer who exposes our fears and frailties. The fact the writer can share dark and violent imagery for our enjoyment in a safe and shared place is a positive thing. Ideas, even terrible ones in the world of horror, are being expressed without fear of retaliation in real life. The wall between fiction and reality is kept in high regard, and what a writer says is understood to be not what they believe in real life and the world is fine.
I think that is one of the traps of social media for us writers, that we share our thoughts on politics and the world, and because of that everything blends together in a fan's mind. Our books become political statements. Our tweets become part of the fiction. People want more highly charged statements from famous (and not so famous, such as myself) people to "support" their side. I have never liked the whole notion of celebrity culture because I see it as a tad hypocritical and self-serving. I feel, "Use your fame for good!" can quickly turn into, "I do good to look good!" and the notion of sacrifice and helping others is lost.
But that is just me. Some people enjoy celebrity culture and activism, so to each their own. I have no right to bitch other than my voice and I am here and wish to share. And here I go again with the negative thoughts and bitching. It is best to get it all out.
But the belief in the dichotomy of negativism and positivism is a core of who I was back when I did reviews, and who I still am today. This trait is a part of my heritage, passed down to me by my elders, and I know they look down at me from above with pride. No matter how bad it is in life for you, you must be a positive force. Did you make someone smile today? Your personal life may be complete shit, but did you make someone else's life a better place by sharing a beautiful thought, or offering some helpful advice? Did you, despite how terrible things may be for you, help someone else out of that dark place instead of yourself?
Because I believe when we lift others up it lifts ourselves up as well.
That is what I hate about watching the news these days, no matter what side you are on it is all tearing someone else down. We are locked in a negativist cycle. I wish I could forget about it all, act like this is a normal and sane world, and see people compliment each other for good and great things. to help each other out. To be a force for good in the world.
And when someone attacks someone, spreads venom, or seethes hatred, to turn the other cheek and walk away. No matter what the side. No matter what the belief. No matter what the issue. Even if your life is shit because of what the other side did to you, to be the better person and to focus on lifting up instead of tearing down.
In my reviews, I could have taking the "everything sucks" approach and been one of these critics who rises to fame off of their nastiness to others. There is an audience for that, and I frankly consider it to be an art form - not to be taken too seriously, but being that scathing is a release for some and it is fun to watch if done well. Just look at the late Joan Rivers and how she got nasty to others for fashion foibles, but really that was all in good fun and was a part of that culture of fame and glamour of the day.
But everything does not suck. Even in the worst written books, there are dreams there trying to get out. Part of my core belief is trying to see those things and express them. Every flower starts as a seed in dirt that is mixed with manure. If you can't care for that seedling flower when you do not see it, you will never see anything more than dirt and shit in your life. You have to believe that flower will bloom someday, and to be out there every day to water it, protect it from the harsh sun and hurtful wind, and to care for the something you do not see in the hopes it will become a beautiful part of your life someday.
That is me with new writers.
And because of them, my life is full of beautiful flowers.
Thoughts over the horizon of books like a coming storm, the flashes of light over the horizon that tell you turbulent weather is out there, somewhere, and it may or may not be coming your way.
It is one of the beautiful things about living in the desert, the vast tracts of nothingness and the skies that stretch on forever. And at night, when the storms are rolling about and their light shows on full display, the light shows in the heavens that let you know exactly how small you are in this universe, and how short your life really is in the scheme of things.
And the storms do not always hit. In books, typically if you write about a storm it is sure to come, because if you didn't pull that literary card out of your hat and warn of it, why wouldn't you use it? No, out here, our Creator plays with us in mysterious ways. Not every storm that threatens hits. You will get calm nights with light shows that dazzle and make you stop and stare at a pitch black sky, waiting for the next burst of intense white light to light up the night, or maybe just a spot on the inky black horizon miles away.
The storm, for all its bombast and bluster, may never come.
It could be traveling in a line away from you, beside you, or going somewhere over there in the black of night. You could see the stars above and still watch the storms at night. You could wake up the next day and not see one puddle of water from a single drop of rain.
Yet the memories of the light show will stay with you for a while, until they themselves fade away.
Such it is with the books floating around in my head. Longer this time, more of a commitment. Something spectacular, or something simple. Or perhaps, something myself. The thoughts echo inside my head like the lights of that storm, flashing to life every once and a while in an inky sea of blackness and despair.
Writing about it helps.
I force myself to write daily, taking time off for the weekends to reflect and rest, but yet pushing on with a commitment to write something, anything, each day. When I stumble is when something overwhelmingly negative comes out, and I am purging less negativity these days two weeks in. I don't like the negative thoughts because they are less true to who I am, but since I am being transparent here in my rehabilitation as a writer I put them out. My frustrations revolve around the platforms, free speech, the ability for content creators to make a living off their work, and allowing writers the freedom to write about whatever they choose and have a place to share that without fear.
If there is two sides of people in this world, it is those who peddle fear and those who believe in coming together. I don't care what party you swear loyalty to, what views you share on social media, you can fall into one of those buckets and be either a force of negativity in this world or one of positivism.
And a positive force can be one that has a mostly negative voice, such as a horror writer who exposes our fears and frailties. The fact the writer can share dark and violent imagery for our enjoyment in a safe and shared place is a positive thing. Ideas, even terrible ones in the world of horror, are being expressed without fear of retaliation in real life. The wall between fiction and reality is kept in high regard, and what a writer says is understood to be not what they believe in real life and the world is fine.
I think that is one of the traps of social media for us writers, that we share our thoughts on politics and the world, and because of that everything blends together in a fan's mind. Our books become political statements. Our tweets become part of the fiction. People want more highly charged statements from famous (and not so famous, such as myself) people to "support" their side. I have never liked the whole notion of celebrity culture because I see it as a tad hypocritical and self-serving. I feel, "Use your fame for good!" can quickly turn into, "I do good to look good!" and the notion of sacrifice and helping others is lost.
But that is just me. Some people enjoy celebrity culture and activism, so to each their own. I have no right to bitch other than my voice and I am here and wish to share. And here I go again with the negative thoughts and bitching. It is best to get it all out.
But the belief in the dichotomy of negativism and positivism is a core of who I was back when I did reviews, and who I still am today. This trait is a part of my heritage, passed down to me by my elders, and I know they look down at me from above with pride. No matter how bad it is in life for you, you must be a positive force. Did you make someone smile today? Your personal life may be complete shit, but did you make someone else's life a better place by sharing a beautiful thought, or offering some helpful advice? Did you, despite how terrible things may be for you, help someone else out of that dark place instead of yourself?
Because I believe when we lift others up it lifts ourselves up as well.
That is what I hate about watching the news these days, no matter what side you are on it is all tearing someone else down. We are locked in a negativist cycle. I wish I could forget about it all, act like this is a normal and sane world, and see people compliment each other for good and great things. to help each other out. To be a force for good in the world.
And when someone attacks someone, spreads venom, or seethes hatred, to turn the other cheek and walk away. No matter what the side. No matter what the belief. No matter what the issue. Even if your life is shit because of what the other side did to you, to be the better person and to focus on lifting up instead of tearing down.
In my reviews, I could have taking the "everything sucks" approach and been one of these critics who rises to fame off of their nastiness to others. There is an audience for that, and I frankly consider it to be an art form - not to be taken too seriously, but being that scathing is a release for some and it is fun to watch if done well. Just look at the late Joan Rivers and how she got nasty to others for fashion foibles, but really that was all in good fun and was a part of that culture of fame and glamour of the day.
But everything does not suck. Even in the worst written books, there are dreams there trying to get out. Part of my core belief is trying to see those things and express them. Every flower starts as a seed in dirt that is mixed with manure. If you can't care for that seedling flower when you do not see it, you will never see anything more than dirt and shit in your life. You have to believe that flower will bloom someday, and to be out there every day to water it, protect it from the harsh sun and hurtful wind, and to care for the something you do not see in the hopes it will become a beautiful part of your life someday.
That is me with new writers.
And because of them, my life is full of beautiful flowers.
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